My Family

Well some good news came today. David is having a little boy that is due in January. Shaelyn is going to have a little brother. It is exciting but sad at the same time. Exciting because of a new life and a new family is being started, but sad because reality sometimes hurts. Shaelyn is going to have a hard life. All because I made bad choices. She is going to have two families who live completely different lives. I hope and pray that I am able to help her through all the hard times. Another hard or sad thing is that my family is gone. Yes, it has been for over a year but it still hurts to know that I could not make it work. I guess it just reminds me, haunts me, that if I could have only made things work that my family would still be together. I am not saying that I would ever go back. I would not. I am so happy now. I just miss the family that I had. Maybe just the thought of family. Like the thought of "that should have been me". Not the thought of I should be having his kid but I should be happily married and having more children. Well whatever, life goes on. I am patient lol... NOT! hehe. I told Shaelyn today and she got mad told me that she does not want a brother! She wants a sister! She does not like brothers! It made me laugh because coming from an only child of 3 1/2 years it was pretty cute. Like she knew that she got to choose. My girl is so cute. Her smile helps get me through each day.