Moving Forward

You know how sometimes you feel like just giving up? I mean think about all the thoughts that go through your mind.
"It really isn't going to happen for you".
"All the good guys are gone".
"You might just have to settle."
"Your being too picky".

You never hear yourself say...
"Wow so many great guys to choose from."
"This guy is too perfect".

Why is finding a good guy so hard? I mean ya there are decent guys out there to date but they never seem to be right for me. There was this guy that I dated that I wanted to fall for. He was smart, fun, established, and cute. But the connection was not there. So we went our seperate ways.

Someone asked my mom a couple months ago if I was just being too picky... What is considered being picky?
Wanting...
a guy who can take me to the temple?
a guy that accepts me for who I am and knows who I was?
a guy that makes me feel special?
a guy that wants to spend tons of time with me?
a guy that has goals and asperations?
a guy that wants children?
a guy that is willing to give 110% to our relationship?
a guy that I have a connection with?
a guy that will be a good father?

I just do not see how any of those attributes are me being picky. I think that they are pretty normal. It is not like I am asking for a rich, certain height, eye color, skin color, hair color, or anything else along those lines.

I just want to feel loved and needed.

I swear the last few guys that I have dated have made me want to give up on the thought of finding that guy. They might have opened doors, paid for the date, been smart, funny, and fun, but they were lacking in integrity. Respect is huge in my world. Should be huge in the lives of everyone.

My life was full of disrespect and I know now how important it is. Especially when I have a daughter to think about. Being disrespected and/or the feeling of being used is horrible.

Everyone deserves the chance to find the one that will treat them good no matter what.

I know that God is watching out for me. I know that he has a plan for me. I just wish I knew the plan. How many bad apples do I have to bite into to find the ripe one? How long am I suppose to wait? Am I going to be single till I am 30?

Being single is not horrible but having someone is so much nicer.

Nights are less lonely.
Mornings are a little brighter.
Days seem to be less stressful.
Conflicts seem to be okay.

Like I said I know that God is watching out for me. I know He has a plan and I need to be patient. I need to put my Faith in Him and remember that everything will work out.

Still living at home with my parents is hard. I LOVE them to death but I am 25 and need to be on my own. I need to feel like life is moving forward. I mean it is. I have made so much progress in my life in the last year.
I made it to the Temple and was able to take out my endowments.
I have made friends that I love and appreciate.
I have learned to be a better Mother, daughter, sister, friend, and just a better person all around.

I can look in the mirror and finally see the person that God knew I could be. I mean I have a lot of work still but at least I can smile back at myself.

I deserve a great guy. My daughter deserves a great father. I want it and I will have it.

I will not settle for your average Joe. I am not your average Jane. I deserve the best and I will wait for it.

I am worth it!